The Hotel Bill

An elderly lady decided to give herself a big treat for her significant birthday by staying overnight in one of London's most expensive hotels.


When she checked out next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for £250.00.

She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so high. "It's a nice hotel but the rooms certainly aren't worth £250.00 for just an overnight stop without even breakfast."


The clerk told her that £250.00 is the 'standard rate' so she insisted on speaking to the Manager.

The Manager appeared and forewarned by the desk clerk announced: "the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference centre which are available for use."
'But I didn't use them," she said.
''Well, they are here, and you could have," explained the Manager.

He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers fromEdinburgh, Glasgow, and Aberdeen performing here," the Manager said.

"But I didn't go to any of those shows," she said.
"Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied.

No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!"

The Manager was unmoved, so she decided to pay, wrote a cheque and gave it to the Manager.

The Manager was surprised when he looked at the cheque. "But madam, this cheque is only made out for £50.00." ''That's correct. I charged you £200.00 for sleeping with me," she replied.

"But I didn't!" exclaims the very surprised Manager.

"Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."


Don't mess with Seniors!!!

Cricket Diplomacy

Funeral - Excellent one

A family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Ba)
arrived from the US . It was sent
by one of the daughters.

The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in
it when they opened the lid;
they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:

Dear Chandrakantbhai, Arvindbhai, Smitaben and Varsha ,

I am sending Ba's body to you, since it was her wish that she should be cremated
in the compound of our
ancestral home in GUJARAT .

Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leave is consumed.

You will find inside the coffin, under Ba's body, cans of cheese, 10 packets of
Tobler chocolates and 8
packets of Badam (peanuts) please divide these among all of you.

On Ba's feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan. There
are also 2 pairs of shoes
for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons. Hope the sizes are correct.

Ba is wearing 6 American T-Shirts. The large size is for Mohan.

Just distribute the rest among yourselves.

The 2 new Jeans that Ba is wearing are for the boys.

The Swiss watch that Reema wanted is on Ba's left wrist. Shanta masi, Ba is
wearing the necklace, earrings
and ring that you asked for. Please take them off her.

The 6 white cotton socks that Ba is wearing must be divided among my nephews.

Please distribute all these fairly.
Love Smita.

PS : If anything more required let me know soon as Bapuji is also not feeling
too well now a days.